Dad jokes – love ‘em or hate ‘em, they’re some of the most recognizable funnies out there. Mostly for the giant groans they illicit from everyone in earshot. A rite of passage for father figures everywhere, the humor in a dad joke comes from just how corny and cheesy they are. We all know the classic, Hi Hungry, I’m Dad!, but in honor of Father’s Day, here are 25 of the best (or worst) dad jokes out there.
- I spent a lot of time, money, and effort childproofing my house… but the kids still get in.
- Why is it a bad idea to iron your four-leaf clover? ‘Cause you shouldn't press your luck.
- What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbelievable.
- Why do vampires seem sick? They're always coffin.
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
- Which days are the strongest? Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
- What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta!
- What happens when it rains cats and dogs? You have to be careful not to step in a poodle.
- I remember as a kid, my dad got fired from his job as a road worker for theft. I refused to believe he could do such a thing, but when I got home, the signs were all there.
- We all know about Murphy’s Law: anything that can go wrong will go wrong. But have you heard of Cole’s Law? It’s thinly sliced cabbage.
- I don’t trust stairs. They are always up to something.
- What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho Cheese.
- I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.
- You think swimming with sharks is expensive? Swimming with sharks cost me an arm and a leg.
- Do you want a box for your leftovers? No, but I'll wrestle you for them.
- What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little hoarse.
- How much does it cost Santa to park his sleigh? Nothing, it's on the house.
- Don't trust atoms. They make up everything!
- I wouldn't buy anything with velcro. It's a total rip-off.
- Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
- Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere!
- The rotation of the earth really makes my day.
- Why do dogs float in water? Because they are good buoys.
- When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.
